Enthusiastic reader responses greeted the first version of Have You Called Your Parents Today? Here’s a sample.
Atim Nkpubre, Comms Consultant formerly with MTN:
“Oh, wow! I just called my mum. I lost my dad almost three decades ago in my prime.
Thank you so much for the reminder. We really should reach out to them before the weekend. Brilliant day to you!”
Another reader stated, “That’s a good one, but have you forgotten that I no longer have parents?
Damilola Grillo responded to the responses and queries. We run her answers hereunder.
Cases in geriatric care
Even though old age is not a disease, there are several reasons why older people need senior care and medical attention, from social problems to health problems. I’ll start with social concerns. Older adults often live a life of loneliness. This is an area where the government and society should offer solutions for our senior citizens. When the empty nest phenomenon is in effect, loneliness in old age becomes problematic due to the change in dynamics within the family. Here, every child (of those who have any) moves out of the house to attend school, establish their own life, get married (forming nuclear families), move to different towns or nations, and hardly communicate with their parents. In certain instances, loneliness can also result from divorce or the death of a partner. For example, the “Japa” phenomenon is seriously harming older parents in Nigeria, who are left to rely on unskilled caregivers working under the pretence of domestic staff hired by children or the older adults themselves or uneducated family members who know very little or nothing about providing care for the older adults. This raises the problem of elder abuse, which is carried out by those providing care for our older citizens, whether intentionally or inadvertently. Elder abuse is any mistreatment meted out to an older adult where there is an expectation of trust but causes distress or harm to the older person. Elder abuse can take these forms:
1. Physical
2. Sexual
3. Emotional or psychological
4. Financial
5. Abandonment/neglect
6. Self-Neglect.
Disrespect and a lack of importance are two more social issues observed in geriatric care cases. In our culture, senior citizens should come first and not have to stand in a queue to get anything from any institution that provides services. Another problem that older individuals face is the uncertain economy since vulnerable older adults or those who have retired do not benefit from inflationary times.
Regarding health, some older people are more vulnerable to conditions like arthritis and reduced functionality of essential body organs like the liver, kidney, heart, and lungs. Among the difficulties older persons experience are diabetes, visual impairment and hearing loss. Another health problem that requires intentional geriatric care but is often not talked about in this region of the world is dementia. Some people may develop complex health issues as they age, necessitating geriatric care.
Read also: Have you called your parents today?
Examples of parental distancing
I addressed parental distancing in the first section. Still, I would like to add another: Spiritual leaders who tell their followers that their older parents are the main reason behind their problems, which typically involve them not succeeding in life, can also cause parental distancing. As a result, these children often label their parents as witches or wizards and ultimately abandon them.
Parental care decisions in large families separated by distance
Making well-informed judgements about senior care is essential. Because of the size of the family, one should minimise dependency unless there are experts in the family who are knowledgeable about caring for older family members. Many families secretly mistreat older people. Given the heterogeneity of older persons, families should seek the advice of geriatrics specialists when making decisions for their older loved ones. Grandma D’s prescription for medication differs from Grandma E’s, while Grandpa A may receive entirely different care than Grandpa B. However, I always reiterate that older adults whose cognitive abilities are still functioning should be involved in whatever care decisions are made on their behalf. The only exception is when the older adult cannot make an informed decision, and their wards can decide on their behalf.
When does caregiving become an issue in families?
Caring for older family members demands patience and an endless supply of kindness, so it takes a lot of work. Families may encounter various challenges when caring for an older loved one. Some families may have a conflict of interest about who should take on the role of primary caregiver. In contrast, caregiving for an ageing parent may be beyond the knowledge of the family member in question in others. The care of an older loved one may be jeopardised if these problems are not resolved, so geriatric specialists should be called to advise families on how to care for their senior citizens.
One problem that primarily affects the family or the primary caregiver is when an older adult needs close monitoring care due to various health conditions, which comes with a financial cost. Consequently, this leads to tension, anxiety, and despair, and it may have an impact on family members’ mental health. It may also cause animosity among family members taking care of the older person or between anyone making a financial contribution to their care. When resentment starts to grow, it’s critical to assess one’s feelings and mental health and seek the assistance of trained caregivers.
Caring for an older adult requires a strong support network from family members and senior care specialists; it takes work.
