• Friday, February 23, 2024
businessday logo


SINGLES, if you’re not happy and content now, you will not be happy and content in marriage


I got married almost two years ago at the age of 36. By most people’s standards, that’s considered late. Not to talk of throwing in the “African” factor.

You know those phone calls or conversations with your mother that begin with, “My daughter, is there someone in the picture?” Or, the many times she would tell you about a “dream” she had that shed light on the various things hindering your promotion into married life. Lol. African mothers are blessed!

But then, the irony was, I could have gone on being single till I was 50 and it wouldn’t have mattered to me. Why? I made sure my life as a single was rich and fulfilling. Before you read on, understand that this is not the clichéd married woman giving single people advice that some people might scoff at, “You have your own husband now, abi? Easy for you to say!” No, this really was the way I lived my single life. I was having such a blast as a single mother that at one point, I was concerned about a man coming along to “cramp my style.” In other words, I learnt to find contentment and fulfillment first in my relationship with God, then in the many things he had blessed me with – my daughter, my career, my business, my ministry, my family and friends, etc. I tried my best to make the most of my single life.

I didn’t allow fear or people’s opinions to hold me back. I’ve heard people say things like, “Ah, why are you flying so high in your career? You’ll limit your choices o. Men don’t like women who are more successful than they are.” That’s ridiculous and too many single ladies are putting their lives on hold because they are waiting for “The One.” In my blog post titled, “Feeling unhappy and unfulfilled in your relationship? This might be why” I explained the link between the way a single person lives their life and their experiences later in marriage.

Remember this, being single is never God’s second best. Yes, marriage is wonderful but never allow yourself to feel as if you are condemned to living a second-class life until your spouse comes along. No, live everyday as a precious gift from God. Each new day is loaded with too many benefits to allow slip by without taking full advantage.