If you want to have an exciting and beautiful marriage, you must understand that there are intentional steps you can take that will help and empower your marriage to progress.
The goals I shall be discussing are important to set you both on track; they are also rewarding and very fulfilling when you can achieve them.
Let’s quickly look into the five different goals that you can set for your marriage. I shall cite a few examples around them to make them more practical for you.
Communication goals
Communication is an important part of every relationship and most of the time people struggle with it.
Communication is beyond just exchanging words, expressing what you want, or just saying anything in your mind. It’s important to set a good tone, at the right pace, and time and with the right words.
If communication is 7% of words, 38% of tonality, and 55% of body language, then you want to make sure that you can keep a mark on all of these skills.
Some of the goals you can set for communication between you and your partner include:
Active listening
Look into how you can be more intentional about listening when your partner is speaking.
To achieve this you may want to learn how to document or note down what you would have said at the time your partner is speaking, using a jotter or notepad.
You can also use the notes to help you organise your thoughts and choose the right words for your response.
These tips can help you resist the urge to interrupt and allow your partner to finish speaking.
Empathy
If you lack empathy, you’ll not be able to connect with why your partner feels the way they do and why they are struggling with what they are struggling with.
To help your partner feel heard, validated, and seen, learn to show empathy in your conversations.
Sex goals
If you think that sex will happen every day just because you are now married, you are mistaken. You need to be intentional about how you cater to your sexual life. Sometimes you can have spontaneous sex, and sometimes you can schedule it.
You should both ask yourselves how many times you want to have sex in a week. This does not mean that you can’t still have spontaneous sex. Scheduling sex can help you stay accountable and make sure that you are having sex regularly, perhaps once or twice a week in addition to any spontaneous encounters.
Money goals
As couples, you must be able to have conversations about how to increase your earning power so that you can use your money to do better things. You should also be able to create a budget that works for the various needs of your household or family.
Practice the habit of keeping some percentage of your earnings as savings, and then investment. Start with low-risk investments and learn about finance from financial coaches and platforms. This will engender your mutual growth and the ability to trust yourselves with money.
You should also consider setting a goal around building trust with your partner in terms of financial decisions.
Growth goals
You must take time to understand how you want your relationship to grow, the areas you both struggle with, and how you can overcome that struggle.
If you need to invest in books, courses, mentorship, etc, that are designed to empower you in a particular area, then that will be helpful.
Bonding goals
Sometimes, it starts with the little things you do in a week, e.g. movie night, evaluation seat (sitting down to evaluate how far your relationship is going, and the areas that you need to both work on).
For vacation, you can both plan vacations once or twice a year, depending on your financial capacity.
If you fail to set or plan your goals, you’ll struggle to make them a reality. You’ll watch others achieve what you want, but you won’t see yourself achieving it because you’re not prepared. Act now, don’t drag it.
If you need help with setting goals with your spouse by working on yourselves first, please reach out to me via email at [email protected]
