“Be genuinely interested in everyone you meet and everyone you meet will be genuinely interested in you”, the wise words of Rasheed Ogunlaru, a leading life and leadership coach.
Nigeria, and indeed the world are experiencing surging waves of relational crisis that have left many devastated.
Relationship experts say that communication issues and differences in values or goals are often the top reasons for breakups. And that these challenges can strain a relationship, leading to separation.
Jenni Jacobsen, a licensed social worker maintains that communication issues are often the root causes of problems in relationships and one of the most common breakup reasons.
“They are one of the key breaks up reasons in many cases. Healthy communication creates an amazing cycle. Couples who are happy tend to communicate more, and couples who regularly communicate boost relationship satisfaction,” she pointed out.
Communication is said to be the lifeblood of human society. In other words, human society cum relationships would be dead without communication. And because of the integral nature of communication to mankind, effective communication is a skill that must be learned.
Relationship is a choice we make whether marital or just friendship. In life, there is always a choice you have to make in everything you do, and the obvious truth is that the choice you make makes you.
Evi Itive, a relationship expert believes that relationships involve giving, sharing, and reaching compromises.
“Relationship is all about sacrifice, the problem with many people is their self-centredness,” he said.
Relationship simply put means dealing with other people. As it is said, “No man is an Island.” No one undertakes a journey alone. We depend upon others constantly in both tangible and intangible aspects to move us towards our destination.
That is to say, we cannot succeed without the help of others, but forming positive relationships can be a challenge.
Here is how you can build a solid relationship with others:
Respect: When it comes to relationships, everything begins with respect, with the desire to place value on other people. The thing about respect is that you should show it to others, even before they have done anything to warrant it.
Share Experiences: Respect can lay the foundation for a good relationship, but respect alone is not enough. You cannot be relational with someone you do not know. It requires shared experiences over time.
Trust: When you respect people and you spend enough time with them to develop shared experiences, you are in a position to develop trust. Trust is essential to all good relationships.
According to George MacDonald, a Scottish author and poet, “To be trusted is a greater compliment than to be loved.”
Reciprocity: One-sided personal relationships don’t last. If one person is always the giver and the other is always the receiver, then the relationship will eventually disintegrate.
Mutual Enjoyment: When the relationship grows and starts to get solid, the people involved begin to enjoy each other. Just being together can turn even unpleasant tasks into positive experiences.
Communication is like every other thing in life, such as driving, and cooking, among others; the more you do it, the better you get at it. But you must understand the fundamentals first.
Honesty: This is an act of being sincere or truthful. In a relationship, there is no need to impress, just be you. Being fake will put you in much more dilemma.
Right Attitude: Attitude, they say is everything. The quest to communicate in the first place is key to succeeding in a relationship. This will keep you going even when you meet obstacles on your way.
Interest and Openness: Besides, to be effective in communication, you need to show sincere interest in the other person and be open about yourself. This doesn’t mean you should talk about yourself all the time or divulge personal secrets.
Conversation Rules
Listen: You’ll never learn anything while talking. Careful listening makes you better able to respond. Our problem is that most times we don’t care to listen even before we talk.
Body Language: The issue here is on how much you can read into body language. Body language is like spoken words.
The body language that use while you’re talking is like the talk itself. So be natural and speak from the heart!
Eye Contact: One unique rule of body language you must embrace is eye contact. Maintaining good eye contact will go a long way in making you successful in communication. Maintain eye contact when you are asking a question and when your partner is talking. When you are speaking, you can take your eyes off your partner occasionally.
