• Saturday, March 02, 2024
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Controlling your emotions &using your emotional intelligence (2)


Last week i talked about the how absurd it is for you to turn the other cheek to co-workers bullies/brain hackers.  There are some slaps someone will give to you and it will be so painful that the other side of the cheek cannot turn no matter how hard you try to turn it. This turning the other cheek must have worked for the generation of old but for our generation, if you try this, you might not survive it. I am not kidding here. People who try to play on your emotions and intelligence will always try you out in a smaller way and if you keep quiet and did not react, the main hammer will be hit on you.

At work place, it is vital you control your emotions and this does not apply only to employees. As an employer,if an employee makes a mistake and the next thing you do is to bark and shout  ….you have totally lost your emotional control and this is not the kind of response i am referring to. Infact, your shouting could make matters worse and create disrespect from your employees. There are ways to handle employees who keep making silly mistakes and refuses to learn and adjust. Find out why the employee is fumbling and use your intelligence to psych-analyse him or her. The problem here is that most employers themselves do not even know how to make use of their emotional intelligence so they end up losing most potential and useful employees. As a boss, are you aware some empoyees have more foresight than you? There is nothing to be ashamed here and this is not the issue of- i am above you talk so i cannot take any advice/input from you. When you have such employees whom you get lucky to notice their great potentials, do not scare them off by being bossy. Most of them might present their potentials in a wrong manner , so it is up to you to use you emotional intelligence to extract what you need from such an employee to grow your business or company. Be very careful when you are doing this and avoid trashing such an employee after getting what you want. Belive me, this does not work well in the long run. Most executives always feel it is smartness and business savy, using intelligent employees and leaving them high and dry without compensation. If  such an employee knows he/she has what can uplift your business and you feel you can play him/her, it makes them want to destroy you. So use your emotional intelligence tactfully so that such employee will continue to be useful to your business and company.

On the contrary there are also some employees who turn around to use the resources of their employer to the employer’s disadvantage. This kind of attitude happens daily at our work places and most employers immediate reactions is always very rash . Most employers just act on this without thinking and using their emotional intelligence ethically. It could be very painful discovering that your employee is doing secret financial deals at your back with your company names/resources.

Recently, a client of mine who has an office here in Abuja discovered that her Manager at his office in Lagos organized a business and channeled the financial benefits to her personal accounts without notifying him. The most painful part was that she used some the company staff who also was so stupid not to inform the owner of the company about what was happening. So i actually walked in to this mess on the day my client discovered this and all through that day, we never achieved anything else because the man was totally disorganized by this betrayal of his trusted staff.  Some thing must have made this staff take such criminal act since she was trusted by this employer and has worked with him a long period. This is the first thing my client should find out  rather i witnessed  my client in his anger lashing out the staff on phone. He was angry beyond even thinking straight and using his emotional intelligence properly. I looked at him and saw where this was getting him and asked him about his lawyer…he said he does not want the lawyer to handle this.  The staff was in Lagos and my client in Abuja and as far as i am concerned, this should not be a phone conversation.

Using your emotional intelligence correctly is one area of your job responsibility that should not be neglected. Lots of people have this intelligence but they always allow their emotions to take control thereby making a whole nonesense of their intelligence. If your emotions are not under control, your inteeligence will be misused and you will always make huge work mistakes.

As an employer, if you have searched yourself and discover you cannot handle your emotions(why can’t you anyway?) then hire an efficient P.A to think  and manage your crises for you.

Are you wondering why an employer is not capable of controlling his/her emotions? Deep question! I will open your eyes someday with this topic!!

Getting a good and efficient Persoal Assistant is not easy so be careful whom you hire to clean your job garbbage. Look for a career shark….yea..i have talked about this sometime ago….being a career/business shark!!

By the way, our Abuja business meetings(for males/females) are still on with topics on- Using your Emotional Intelligence, how being a career/business shark helps boost your career/business, am i being used by my employer? what kind of business works for me, Getting the best of my MLM marketing, Must i have a CALL card, Is financial capital the priority in starting my small business etc?

We have prolific Economic empowerment speakers and successful Enterpreneurs speaking in this meetings. Register by sending me your short profile and what you want to achieve to   [email protected]

To round up this topic, let me make it clear here that the fact that you are an employer or a gainfully employee indicates that you have intelligence but the main issue is making use of it. Again each person’s level of intelligence differs. Yours could be higher than your friend’s so it is vital you warm your brain always and do not allow your brain to go senile. Waht do i mean by warming your brain? Please stay away from the oven/microwave… haahhhaaaaaaaaaa..  There are people in their 3o’s but their brains has gone to sleep..senile…camatose… This is allowing yourself to even die before your time. Hey, without your brain being active how can you do good and profitable business and run a top career? If you have an employee who hardly make any contribution during crucial office meetings..watch him/her. Infact your most intelligent  employees should be those ones who challenge you. Do not get offended but invite him/her privately for a brain download …you will be grateful!