Running a business as spouses

Most adults in the world go home after a day’s work and don’t get to see their colleagues until the next working day. Not so for the smaller number of adults who go to the same home of their colleague who happens to be their spouse.

According to a current study by the World Bank, there are around 334 million businesses in the world. About 8 million of these are run by spouses. Our country, Nigeria, is no stranger to this occurrence, and in today’s climate, where Nigerian women generally make more money than their mothers and grandmothers did, thereby reducing the weight of patriarchy in our society, it is less surprising that husbands and wives go into business.

There are several realities of spouses owning and operating a business together:

The first is that you’re partners in every sense of what the word means. Running a business together means you’re essentially working two full-time jobs: managing the relationship and the business. There’s no “clocking out” when you’re at home because work follows you. But this also means you’re always on the same team. Your wins feel bigger, and your losses typically sting less because you’re tackling everything together. That said, you’ll need to set clear boundaries. For example, there are spouses who banish business talk from mealtimes to preserve the relationship. Balancing your roles as partners in love and work takes intention, but when you get it right, it’s fully worth it.

Secondly, arguments are inevitable but also productive. You’re two people with different ideas, perspectives, and sometimes opposing ways of doing things. The trick is learning how to disagree in a way that doesn’t derail the relationship or the business. Arguments can even lead to breakthroughs. They can force a couple to dig deeper, to understand each other better, and to find creative solutions that wouldn’t have surfaced if they were always on the same page. Just remember to leave the ego at the door. In the end, the goal isn’t to win the argument but to build a stronger business and ultimately, a household.

Spouses who own a business together also get to learn each other’s strengths and weaknesses. Running a business together strips away the filters. You’ll see your partner’s work ethic, problem-solving skills, and even their breaking points in a whole new light. This isn’t necessarily a bad thing. In fact, it can help both of you grow closer. For example, a spouse can have a knack for creativity and execution, while another is the big-picture thinker and process driver. Both can play to each other’s strengths, making their business become more efficient and their relationship smoother. But this also means they’ll need to give each other grace, knowing that they are weak in the areas where their other half is strong.

It is difficult for spouses who own a business together to separate work and personal life. When the business is doing well, it’s amazing: you’re celebrating wins together in real time. But when business challenges arise, for example, the ability to pay staff that month is hard or a client hasn’t paid their retainer, it can raise tempers, increase irritability, and even lead to snide remarks between husband and wife. To prevent these, husband and wife joint business owners should schedule regular date nights, weekend getaways, or even just binge-watch a series together. These are significant ways to reconnect as a couple outside the business.

Lastly, running a business as spouses can be fulfilling: the knowledge that you built something that contributes to the family’s survival and even other families’ survival through the hiring and paying of staff can be very satisfying. The shared sense of purpose, the inside jokes borne from late-night brainstorming sessions, are all worth it. Running a business as a couple isn’t only about making money; it can also be about building a legacy for their offspring. Children seeing their parents work together will be another education for them other than what they learn at school.

Toby Nwanede is the CEO of Scintilla, an I.T. company.