It’s been one year, two weeks and three days since you this world. It’s still hard for me to come to terms with the fact that you’re gone. We said we’kyou. You had to deal with a lot of pain while battling an aggressive ailment but you were such a fighter. My warrior woman..you fought until you became weak and frail.
The doctors said that only a miracle could bring you out of the coma and they also mentioned that you’d never be the same again even if you survived.
Taking you off life support is the hardest thing I’ve ever done in my life but it was the best I could do at the time. There was no way I could leave you lying lifeless for such a long time.
I miss you babe. I miss hearing your croaky voice as you sang when taking a shower. I miss how you laughed so hard until you cried. You were such a terrible dancer but I’d give anything to watch you dance again. I miss standing with you in the kitchen while you prepared our meals.
Our daughter reminds me so much of you. She’s starting to look a lot like you. She’s always so full of life just like her mother. Guess what babe? Just like you, she snorts when she laughs. But am worried about our son. He’s become a recluse since you passed.
A lot has really changed in such a short time. Most of your friends hardly come around or call to check on us as they promised to do after your funeral. Your boss has been a regular caller to our home. She makes passes at me, she makes lewd remarks and she keeps on sending me her nudes. I always told you there was something off about that one.
The other day, the lady at the pharmacy down the road slipped a note in my hand, she said I could call her to warm my bed whenever I was lonely. I was embarrassed by her boldness. Babe, I don’t know why all the ladies want to be my friend suddenly. They all pretend to be nice but come with ulterior motives.
I had to be out of town for a few days and I couldn’t get anyone to take care of our kids while I was away, All our friends gave one excuse or the other and because we don’t have any family around, I almost cancelled on the trip. Imagine my shock when Didi offered to help. By the way, Didi is our neighbor.. remember the one we didn’t like because she has several tatoos and piercings? Yeah the one with the blue hair. It’s funny how things have turned out. I wish you were here to see how selfless and amazing she is, you two would have clicked like two peas in a pod. We judged her wrongly babe. She’s totally different from how she looks. She first visited with the other neighbors after you passed but she always returned to check on us.
Unlike the other women that come around me, Didi is different, she does things for the kids and I without expecting anything in return and she is the only person that our son warms up to. She coordinates the kids and I, making sure that we keep the house clean. She takes the kids out from time to time to relieve me and also make me enjoy some “Me time”. She makes me talk about you a lot and this has helped me deal with my pain.
Did I mention that Didi is also a fantastic cook? You know I can’t cook to save my life and she sort of noticed how poorly the kids and I were eating so she took it upon herself to make sure we always have good food to eat.
Babe, your death was an eye opener to me. People will make promises they won’t keep. They will dash your hopes. They will tell lies to make themselves feel good. They will abandon you and won’t show up when you need them. They forget you. But sometimes, the ones that stay are the ones we least expect.
I have to go now babe. The kids and I are going with Didi to the airport to pick up her husband. He’s been abroad for a while. You’re surprised right? Yeah Me too. She doesn’t look married.. .I’ll scoop up and the juicy gist and I’ll write to you again soon..
I love you babe and I miss you so much. You’re irreplaceable.