Dress them their age… and appropriately too!

I was on my way home from work on a Thursday evening and had to stop by at an eatery just close to my home to meet up with a friend. As I stood at the counter waiting my turn to make an order, a party of four walked in. It was a man, his wife, a little boy and a smaller girl who I had to take a second look at. From the ongoing conversation between her mother and the eatery attendant, it was her birthday and the family was out to have a nice time to mark her birthday, which was really cool. She was full of childlike excitement at the prospects of more ice cream and pizza that she may have been normally allowed to have.

What I had a huge problem with; however, was how the little girl was dressed. She seemed to be between 3-4 years of age. She had on a halter neck top with a very little short that just barely covered her bum, pink shiny ankle boots and a dramatic neckpiece that seemed out of place on the neck of a 3-4 year old.

First thought that came to my mind was, ‘‘why on earth would you let your child out the house like that!’’

This is something I have seen one too many times in a lot of public places in Lagos. It hurts my eyes to see to be really frank, as people

stare on with upturned noses wondering what kind of mother lets their daughter out of the house looking like that. And a lot of mothers apparently are guilty of this.

Now, forgive me if I’m wrong, but I do not think we need to let the ‘‘she’s just a small girl’’ line fly anymore when it comes to how we let our female children leave the house when it comes to dressing. I was upset because despite the many stares this little girl got in that eatery, her mother and father didn’t seem to think anything wrong with what they had put her in.

To be fair, in a child’s mind it probably does not mean much and it shouldn’t. In a balanced society, childhood innocence ought to be preserved for as long as it lasts and as wholly as it deserves. Ideally, a child should be free to live without thought or worry about the implications of a dress or pair of shorts he/she is wearing. However, with all the naivety of childhood, it is appalling that they are at the receiving end of heinous crimes like rape and violence.

Sadly, it is the reality we live in and as parents, siblings care takers, it is our duty to ensure that we protect them as fiercely as possible to the best of our ability.

My mother did something with all my female siblings and me. When we were younger, she would go with us to shop for clothes.

We tried them on; she ensured it looked good and smart and that we were well covered in them before she paid for any. She did this for years. When she did stop, I realized that we had picked up very unique and modest styles in dressing that she had unconsciously instilled in us during all those trips to the market. For her, a woman’s body could be properly covered and smart at the same time. My mother is the reason why I do not wear T-shirts with meaningless inscriptions on them (lol).

The Holy Book says that when you train a child in the way he should go, he will not depart from it. And if you do not train a child in the way he should go, he instinctively learns and picks what seems best from the myriad of activities that surround him daily.

I think it is very imperative to start an early age to teach female children the importance of decency, and the value of feminity. I think it’s important to begin from an early age to let female children know that inner beauty also attracts and that there is a place for hardwork, brains and smarts.

KOSISO UGWUEDE