It’s a common saying that when poverty comes in through the door, love moves out through the window. Except for the selected buoyant businessmen, most families have been torn apart with partners proving unfaithful due to the economic woes. Nigeria, Africa’s largest economy, is grappling with a scourge that threatens to undermine the very fabric of its society: infidelity. As the country navigates the challenges of economic reforms and hardship, the institution of marriage is facing unprecedented pressures. Nowadays, we speak of infidelity without much embarrassment. The ugly trend has led to death, assault, misfortune, regrets, and banishment amongst couples. For the fact that when infidelity is mentioned, we do not see bowed heads, broken hearts, or unmentionable terms; rather, we have witnessed calm and cool demeanour, affirming signals; our society has been fragmented and violated.
Driven by poverty and hunger, a call for fidelity in Nigeria is like a solitary voice in a sexual wilderness. Infidelity and other forms of immorality have gained acceptance within the communities. They have assumed a sophisticated tone, a shunning smile, and a tolerant attitude. The stigma of guilt has been erased with a nice-sounding word and invitation display tagged “affair.” Such malaise, which every organised society should condemn, is now wrapped in mystery, fascination, and excitement. What was once behind the scenes—a secret closely guarded—is now in the headlines, a TV theme, a bestseller, as common as the cold.
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The economic downturn has led to a surge in unemployment, with many Nigerians struggling to make ends meet. This has created an environment where desperation and frustration could lead individuals to seek comfort in extramarital affairs. The new year celebrations are over; it’s a season of love, just as the world we live in has several notions of love. Many young men and women are eager to reap where they did not sow through manipulation, deception, and intimidation, no matter what the possible outcomes would be for them. Coping with the economic hardship may not provide all the reasons why people engage in infidelity, but it stands as a contributing factor.
Besides, several celebrities and important personalities in Nigeria who have had their marriages glamorised were often crestfallen by unfortunate extramarital affairs involving their partners. Many people in our time are even ashamed to declare that they have been faithful to their spouses, which is like being ashamed of good health during an epidemic. The shrapnel of social media bombardments ultimately gets embedded in our minds, brainwashing us into believing that adultery is actually healthy, rejuvenating, and understandable. Cheating is no longer a shameful act. The impact of infidelity on Nigerian families cannot be overstated. The breakdown of marriages has led to an increase in single-parent households, with orphaned children often bearing the brunt of the consequences.
Again, the emotional trauma caused by infidelity can have long-lasting effects on children, leading to behavioural problems and emotional distress. The thought is always on the minds of many that the grass is greener on the other side or that it’s acceptable to hop the fence, which has dire consequences. Finding intimacy outside one’s marriage with someone other than one’s mate does not simplify life; it complicates it. Sleeping with someone other than your mate is not acceptable and adventurous; it’s destructive and dangerous.
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Obiotika Wilfred Toochukwu; St. Patrick’s Catholic Church Awgbu.
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