How does it feel to go through the season of waiting and finding the right partner for yourself?
It must seem like a long journey, especially when you begin to experiment with various ways to connect with people both online and offline. Being friendly, looking the part, and just being deliberate about your search for a partner—all contribute to this quest.
I wish you well with your pursuit, but in this article, I want to quickly share with you three ways to position yourself and make it easy to settle with the right person on time.
The first is emotional positioning
This points to the fact that it isn’t enough that you are on a quest to find the right person, you must ensure that your emotions are ready for the process.
You must be emotionally stable and whole to walk into the process of marriage. When it comes to emotional positioning, consider the following:
· Have you healed from past relationships?
· Have you healed from childhood traumas?
· Are you able to accept corrections?
· Are you able to connect with another individual without holding back?
· Are you able to hold vulnerable conversations with your partner?
· Did you experience any form of bullying, rejection, and criticism while growing up?
· Have you healed from them?
You have to take inventory of your emotional life. If for instance, you had a past relationship that led to a breakup, you may want to ask yourself: Have I healed from it? If yes, what lessons did I pick from it? What feedback do I have?
The essence of this is to declutter and purge your mind and your emotions, preparing them for the future journey of marriage.
Another angle to consider is your positivity quotient. Do you feel as though you cannot meet the right person? Do you wonder if there’s someone out there for you? Do you have a positive mindset or are you pessimistic about the process?
Are you investing in resources that can help you keep an emotionally stable life and build the kind of relationship you desire?
These are some of the aspects you should consider to position yourself emotionally.
The second is financial positioning
As you are aware, no one wants to marry a liability. Nowadays, there’s a focus on what one brings to the table. Remember, you are valuable and good enough; conversations about bringing things to the table should not destabilise anyone.
You must realise that you are first an individual with value and worth. Having settled that, your job is to find ways to work on yourself and earn. This is so because when it comes to finances in marriage, your earning capacity, saving ability, financial planning, financial investments, and risk management skills matter a lot.
Based on these, you need a good dose of financial intelligence on how to manage money and multiply money.
Now, the question is, are you intentional about building your financial life or do you think a man needs to take care of you?
If you neglect to enhance your financial capability, ending up with someone uninterested in liabilities may result in chaos. It is so because someone who seeks partnership in marriage won’t align with someone seeking a lifesaver.
The third is spiritual positioning
You must be spiritually awakened enough to connect to someone who will bring you peace to a large extent.
In addition to your beauty and capabilities, it is vital to prayerfully allow God to lead you in choosing a life partner because He knows the future of the person you will marry.
Do you have a healthy relationship with God? Do you fellowship with Him? Are you building intimacy with Him? Do you have a strong anchor of your identity in Him, or are you fixated on a man giving meaning to your existence through marriage?
Are you able to hear from God? Do you walk in obedience to God? Do you talk to God about your relationship choices?
All of these things would empower you if your answers are positive. I want to encourage you to position yourself spiritually so that, for instance, you’ll reduce the chances of falling for someone who pretends to love you but harbours ill intentions against you.
You need discernment beyond observation of character.
By understanding these three types of positioning, you can enhance your decision-making and increase self-awareness in choosing the right partner.
Let me also invite you to join my singles community, Dating 2 Marriage on Purpose where you can learn how to position yourself right for the ideal partner you need. Join us here: http://bit.ly/d2mopclass