Why some people get burned out and others don’t

Stress and burnout are not the same thing. While we know that stress often leads to burnout, it’s possible to handle the onslaught of long hours, high pressure and work crises in a way that safeguards you from the emotional exhaustion, cynicism and lack of confidence in your abilities that characterize burnout.

Our research has found that people can leverage their emotional intelligence to deal with stress in a healthy way and ward off burnout. You, too, might want to try the following:

— DON’T BE THE SOURCE OF YOUR STRESS: Too many of us create our own stress, with its full bodily response, merely by thinking about or anticipating future episodes or encounters that might be stressful. People who have a high need to achieve or perfectionist tendencies may be more prone to creating their own stress. Leaders who are attuned to the pressures they put on themselves are better able to control their stress level.

— RECOGNIZE YOUR LIMITATIONS: Becoming more aware of your strengths and weaknesses will clue you into where you need help. Try to recognize when the demands are outweighing your abilities, and don’t go it alone — instead, surround yourself with trusted advisers and ask for help.

— TAKE DEEP BREATHS WHEN YOU FEEL YOUR TENSION AND ANXIETY RAPIDLY RISING: Mindfulness practices help us to deal with immediate stressors and long-term difficulties. Heightening your awareness of your breathing may be difficult at first, for example, but remember that attention is the ultimate act of self-control.

— RE-EVALUATE YOUR PERSPECTIVE OF THE SITUATION: Do you view a particular situation as a threat to something you value? Or do you view it as a problem to be solved? Changing your perspective on whether you’re experiencing distress or an energizing challenge can have an eye-opening effect on your ability to bring your stress level down.

— DE-ESCALATE CONFLICTS BY PUTTING YOURSELF IN THE OTHER PERSON’S SHOES: The stress from conflicts often leads to burnout, so it’s best to de-escalate conflicts when you can. Be inquisitive, ask questions, listen deeply. By seeking to understand the other person’s perspective, you’ll be in a much better position to gain his trust and influence him.

By using and developing your emotional intelligence, you can put a stop to burnout — for you and for others. But remember that improving your response to stress takes time and effort. Be patient with yourself, as well as forgiving and kind. The last thing you want to do is to make improving your emotional intelligence another source of stress.