Spousal terrorism: Men as endangered species and the danger of a single story

The incidences in which men are the recipients of spousal terrorism abound and they are increasing in geometrical progression but people pretend that it does not exist. In most of the cases, the men are either consciously killed or rendered man-less by cutting off their manhood!

That was the view of one of the victims of amputated manhood, Mr Aliyu, who lamented that his wife had ended his life-even though he was alive to tell the tale. Examples of female terrorism against their husbands and intimate partners include Mrs Agbor, who contracted hired assassins to murder her husband, Godstime (Lekki, Lagos);

Mrs Ajemine who killed her husband, Mr Tyger and buried him in a shallow grave (Rivers State); the woman who butchered his husband, a medic in Owerri and then called his people to come and pick up the pieces; the wife who broke her husbands head for complaining about her food;

It is obvious that men also cry and this becomes more worrisome when we adopt a holistic or multidimensional concept of spousal terrorism

Hilda Asumani, who stabbed her man, Prince Yaw Aboagye, to death for denying her of grass-cutter pepper-soup (Ghana); Esther Githee (Kenya, July 2021) who bathed her husband with hot water; the weird case of Dayanne Cristina (Brazil, 2021) who killed the husband and fried his third leg;

Mr Christopher Muchanga (Zimbabwe) who died after his lover, Rebecca Mbuya, pulled his third leg during a fight; the incestuous lady, Amanda McClure who murdered her boyfriend, Thomas, so that she could marry her father, which she did one month later;

Nkechi, (aka Omalicha), who stabbed her man, Auwal Suleiman to death (Lagos) on allegation of cheating; an eight-month pregnant woman who amputated the husband’s penis after a ‘small’ quarrel; Mrs Omolara Seriki, who damaged the scrotum of her husband in the Iragbiji area of Osun State;

Halima who amputated the penis of her husband, Aliyu Umaru with a knife (Taraba State), pregnant Omowunmi who stabbed her husband Joseph Nwankwo, to death for planning to marry a second wife (Ibadan, 2022); Sharon who stabbed her husband, Gideon Kemboi, to death on allegation of infidelity (Kenya);

Muruntayo, who killed her husband, Alaba Bakare (aka Bama) with an electric iron (what a painful death!), for impregnating his sidekick in Abule-Egba, Lagos. That was after the family returned from a holiday trip from Dubai; Elizabeth Mweete (Zambia) who doused her husband Alex Muleya, with boiling cooking oil; there was this unknown lady who bit off the husband’s (Pierre Paul) ear because of text message from his ex.

There was also the case of Stella Peter who murdered the husband for failure to finance the daughter’s first year birthday party. She had demanded for N30,000 but the man, a phone charger, could only afford N3000. There was this Malawian woman who set her husband and two children ablaze in their home after the husband caught her in their matrimonial bed with another man (the offender playing the victim!).

There were also the cases of Akinkumi Osilulu and Gbade Olaniyi who begged the Ile-Tuntum magistrate court, (Oyo State) to save them from their wives. Janeth poisoned her husband, Sunday Ekpe,( Nasarawa State) watched him die, cut off the his pennis and placed it on his chest for frolicking with her friend; 22-year-old and pregnant Veronica Boniface who stabbed her husband to death following a purported phone conversation with a ‘strange woman (Nasarawa State, May 2020),

20-year Makoduchukwu Ndubisi who stabbed her husband to death at Onitsah, Anambra State; Blessing Edet, who stabbed her fiancé Edet Ebong to death and has been sentenced to 10 years in prison; Victoria Frabutt who tied up James, her husband, and separated his manhood from him.

There was also a mother-in-law who killed her son-in-law Dmitry Bogdanov, by stabbing him 27 times, and cut off his pennis and threw it out of the window, because of the debt he owed her daughter (his wife); 20-year-old Blessing John, bit off the manhood of her boyfriend Johnson;

Lauratu Ahmed poured hot water on the private part of her husband Aliyu Ibrahim ( Kano, 2019), Sibangilizwe Ngamula whose wife grabbed and twisted his genitals, bit off the forehead and a large portion of the foreskin;

Hannan, a Bayero University law student who murdered Saheed Hassan, her husband of just seven months, (Kano) and Mary Harrison who killed her husband for beating the family cat (Dallas, 2018).

We also have Joy who bathed her husband, Akachi with hot water for refusing to open the door for her when she returned from an unknown destination around 11pm (Iyan’Itire, Lagos).

Mrs Udeme Odibi, who killed her husband, Otike by ripping his intestine and genitals with a knife (Sango-Tedo, Lagos) and Lekke Terkaa stabbed by her girlfriend who watched him struggle for life for about nine hours.

There is this young man whose wife just redesigned his face as reported by Francisca Eboh, and a Nigerian lady who publicly beat the daylights out of her fiancé for calling off the relationship (Russia, April, 2022).

Naomi Njoki murdered her husband David Njogu by chopping off his penis; Harriet Nambi,(Uganda), murdered her husband for refusing to have sex with her for two months after a caesarean birth; Dausiya Abdulmumini, used a N40 rat poison to ‘finish’ her husband, (Katsina State), because she didn’t love him;

Ngozi Obasi poured hot water mixed with pepper on her husband’s private part in Lagos; Swati Malik used a porn video to entice her husband, Laxman, and then murdered him; a Fourth wife, Olanshile Nasirudeen murdered her husband for impregnating another woman in Ijebu Ode;

A woman in Zaporozhye, Ukraine screwed a nut into her husband’s pennis for cheating; Gift Paul who so beat her husband that she was remanded in prison at Abuja; Asifa Nakagolo bit off the penis of her husband, Mr Mukaire, for staying overnight at his second wife’s house, (March 2021),

Mrs Toyin Olusola poured hot water on her husband Adeyinka after he collapsed in the house, claiming that the hot water was to revive him; Chinenye Ejiofor conspired with her boyfriend to murder her husband Jude Okeke, in Cameroon early 2018; another lady killed the husband by rubbing poisonous substances on the ‘sweet’ parts of her body which her husband tasted and died, and Agustina, who murdered her husband, Raymond Ihugba, with acid in Akwakuma, Imo State, for failing to meet her financial demands. We all remember the case of Maryam Sanda who murdered Bilyamin Bello because of a text message in his phone,

These are heart-rending stories, with differing levels of wickedness from different types of wives in different climes and for diverse reasons. It is obvious that men also cry and this becomes more worrisome when we adopt a holistic or multidimensional concept of spousal terrorism.

Read also: Spousal terrorism: The men also cry!

Unfortunately, our society looks the other way while lampooning the men for brutalizing ‘weak and harmless’ wives and intimate partners. One thing is obvious; our society is suffering from what Chimamanda Adichie (of the Achebe stock) describes as the danger of a single story.

According to her, if we only hear a single story, we risk a critical misunderstanding because a single story is never complete; it tells only a part of the whole story. Such single stories create stereotypes and the problem with stereotypes is not that they are untrue but that are incomplete; they make one story become the only story (Chimamanda Adichie: The Danger of a single story. TED Talk, 2009).

In this case, there are two intertwined single-stories (SS) SS1: Spousal terrorism is only physical. SS2: wives are the only victims of spousal terrorism. This small expose has shown that men also cry but they cry internally (because it is unmanly to cry!); they bottle up their pains and sorrows; they repress the rage and as we all know, internal bleeding is MORE deadly than external bleeding.

Women cry but they mostly cry externally; they even make a show of their tears and the process, they discharge the pent-up emotion. In due course, I shall identify and discuss the other types of spousal terrorism beyond the physical; the types of spousal terrorism that are deeper, long-lasting and more damaging to the victims.

Meanwhile, with the alarming rate with which women go for the pennis, (cut, bite, fry, mutilate squeeze), I believe that it is time for men to insure their third-legs. This will surely be a big business for the insurance industry, but any insurance firm that wants to market this product must know that I now have the patent right to this idea and product.

Another easy way out is to obey the advice of this entrepreneur at Ekuku-Agbor as contained in the signboard: fear woman! I have deliberately removed the phone number so that whoever wants to get in touch with him for practical strategies and tactics, will have to go through me! We may also explore the applicability of the Federal Government anti-terrorism law on this matter.

I may also seek for a special TETFUND grant to conduct an empirical survey on why the women see the pennis or the penile region, as the most attractive part to attack!(Brutal attack on male penis: An empirical analyses of causes, methods and remedial strategies).