• Friday, December 06, 2024
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Lady maiden Ibru’s 70th birthday and my lucky (narrow) escape (2)

Maiden_Ibru

Lady maiden Ibru’s 70th birthday and my lucky (narrow) escape (2)

He threw up his arms and demanded:

“Why should Nigerians lose their lives during elections or be sold as slaves in Libya? To our shame, young people (including doctors and chartered accountants) are leaving the country in droves. Some have even resorted to crossing the Sahara Desert or swimming across rivers/seas in a desperate pursuit of better lives in Europe.

As for the womenfolk, many of them are pounding the streets of France and Italy as prostitutes and drug traffickers. Christ is our peace. He has reconciled us to God; in one body by the cross. We meet in His name and share His peace. The peace of the Lord be always with you.”

Even the non-believers (names withheld) in the congregation were severely jolted. Only time will tell if they would mend their ways and repent. If they do, then they owe their salvation to the preacher and their redemption to Lady Maiden Ibru. What followed were fulsome encomiums and bountiful accolades which were showered on the birthday girl for her fierce determination to preserve the memory of her beloved husband having become a window and single parent at the age of sixty-two years with young adults to look after – Tivi, Toke, Anita, Uvie and Ose.

The Bishop described Maiden as a magnet who has drawn together a wide circle of friends to whom she is exceptionally devoted and uncommonly loyal. Furthermore, under her leadership, “The Guardian” newspaper was the only national paper (print or electronic media) which was not tainted by the sleaze and corruption of “Dasukigate” – with billions being doled out to media organisations by the National Security Adviser under the last government.

While directing his gaze at the birthday girl, the Bishop declared: “The Lord has been faithful and steadfast. Take my life and let it be consecrated, Lord, to thee. My God, how wonderful thou art. Thy majesty how bright.” As for the “Alleluia Chorus”, it was heavenly. Before matters were concluded, the Bishop acknowledged the presence of “KCOBs” (King’s College Old Boys). This was in addition to thanking the following dignitaries: Lieutenant-General T.Y. Danjuma GCON and his wife Senator Daisy Danjuma for their generous support to the Anglican Church and welfare of the clergy in addition to massive donations to universities,  provision of health facilities, potable water and huge contributions to the poor and internally displaced people (IDPs) especially in the North-East – through the Danjuma Foundation. Awesome.

The General did not mince words when he felt compelled to warn his kith and kin in Taraba State that they were in imminent danger of being wiped out. At the head of the fairly long list were The governor of Edo State, Godwin Obaseki; The governor of Delta State, Senator Ifeanyi Okowa; Senator (Mrs.) Oluremi Tinubu (former first Lady of Lagos State); Aremo Olusegun Osoba (former Governor of Ogun State) and his wife Erelu Derin.

The thanksgiving service was clearly a masterpiece. It was evident that the congregation were in no hurry to exit – even after the recessional hymn. What followed were photographs with the birthday girl basking in the afterglow of communicating with the Almighty. What was now on offer was Maiden the fashionista, giving the paparazzi every shot or angle they asked for.

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Finally, she waded through the crowd of admirers and well-wishers into the ample embrace of a vintage Rolls Royce with her nephew-in-law Olorogun Oscar Ibru ready to accompany her to the shindig at the Federal Palace Hotel which belonged to her late husband Alex. Before I could exit, Most Reverend Dr. Yinka Omololu (name withheld), previously a surgeon in the Nigerian Navy (with the rank of Commodore) and an avid squash player reminded me that having retired from the clergy he was at the Church service incognito but he wanted me to know that he is fully in support of building a wall around Lagos – to be paid for by Donald Trump, President of the United States of America.

The thanksgiving service was clearly a masterpiece. It was evident that the congregation were in no hurry to exit – even after the recessional hymn. What followed were photographs with the birthday girl basking in the afterglow of communicating with the Almighty

Once the wall is built, all the J.K. Randle property which the government had demolished or seized – Chief J.K. Randle Memorial Hall; Dr. J.K. Randle Swimming Pool; The Love Garden (now known as The MUSON Centre) etc. would be returned to the family.

Meanwhile, His Royal Majesty Oba Rilwan Akiolu has issued a proclamation on that day to be conveyed to all Lagosians via Town Criers in accordance with the traditions of Lagos when turbulence is brewing: As the year 2019 draws to a close, the level of poverty is worrisome.

  • There is virtue in contentment.
  • History has taught us that when the King’s horse is missing, among the search party are those who are genuinely hoping that the horse would be found while there may be others who would be hoping that the horse would never be found (lost forever). In between are those who are praying that wherever the horse is, it should be in comfortable surroundings and not lack for food.
  • Integrity is far more valuable than money
  • All Lagosians must shun insincerity, greed and other social vices.
  • In view of the deteriorating security situation in the country, Lagosians should make it a point of duty to be in their homes no later than 9pm (“Isede”). Although Kabiyesi (a devout moslem) was not in church, he sent word – quoting from the Bible:

“What shall it profit a man (or woman) to own the world and lose his (or her) soul.”

Let the party begin.

When the old boys of St. Gregory’s College (names withheld) lurking around the forecourt of the church offered me a ride to the after-church reception, I beat a retreat into the church and exited through the back door. It seemed rather odd that all of them wore dark glasses even though it was getting dark.

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