• Thursday, April 25, 2024
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BusinessDay

Flattened curve-2, vaccines, vaccination, and conspiracy theories

AstraZeneca vaccines

A lot appears to be happening on the Coro front, the cheeriest of which is that we have flattened the curve for the second time. On 21/3/21, we had only 86 fresh cases with 131 on 22/3/21, and a 7-day average of 139. One can confidently say that things are looking up, (even though literarily, the figures are looking down). However, the total number tested as at 22/3/21 was 1,727,427 and this is not up to 1% of our guesstimate-based population. This casts a pale shadow on the statistical underpinning of flattened-curve 2, as well as other discussions and decisions based on the figures.

The AstraZeneca vaccination programme has commenced, with Dr Nyong, whose father had earlier died of Coro, as the first recipient. The president, who has outsourced his role as the National Incident Commander to PTF et al, has been jabbed live on TV, just like other political and public figures have. Lagos State which started the program on 15/3/21 at 88 facilities across the 20 LGAs made the record of vaccinating 12,720 people within 48 hours (including 3442 healthcare workers, 3796 frontline workers, and 260 strategic leaders) and the total for Nigeria as at last week was 122410 jabs. And then, the conspiracy theories and theorists have taken over the discourse. People have even doubted whether there was ‘anything’ in the syringe with which the physically rejuvenated PMB was jabbed.

When the vaccines were developed, sceptics across the globe queried the speed with which it was made as an evidence of a hidden agenda

Since the onset of ‘coronisation’ in December 2019, the public have had to contend with assorted conspiracy theories: That there was nothing like Coro, that it was a medical warfare from China, that in Nigeria, it was and is an avenue for self-enrichment and that some people created the Coro myth so as to design a vaccine for money-making. When the vaccines were developed, sceptics across the globe queried the speed with which it was made as an evidence of a hidden agenda. They wondered why there had been no vaccines for oldies like Ebola and malaria while that of Coro was developed within a twinkling of an eye. It was also argued that the vaccines would be used to alter human DNA, implant some chips so as to monitor and manipulate people and that it was a strategy to depopulate the black world. Bill gates was particularly mentioned and maligned in this regard. There were then reports of various side effects, including those who died, who got shorter or fatter or grew more gray hairs after jabbing and that the AstraZeneca vaccine caused blood clots.

As I layman, I know that different people react differently to different medicines. In Nigeria, it was argued that the FG went for AstraZeneca, which is the 4th in terms of efficiency because it did not care for the peoples’ welfare. Of course, Yahaya Bello who denied the reality of Coro also made a caricature of the vaccine and vaccination. And then, some countries across the world suspended the deployment of the AstraZeneca vaccines and that gave more flip to the conspiracy theories. Many people are confused, skeptical and are reluctant to jab due to these conspiracy theories. I just got a report that at a jabbing centre in Lagos was populated by Chinese and Indian nationals, while Nigerians have continued to stay away.

Machiavelli (The Prince) had argued that one of the reasons why change was (and continues to be) the most perilous undertaking was that those who opposed the change were very vociferous in its antagonistic antics while those who favoured the change did not make much positive noise. In this case, those who are against the vaccines are engaged in propaganda, subterfuge and socio-psychic warfare while those in support are not making serious efforts to market their support of the vaccine.

As for me I have already registered for the vaccination online and I will take it one of these days. One of my children has also been jabbed and I also know some close friends who have gone through the process. I also believe that the ubiquitous Whiteman will not derive any benefit from decimating the black race and that if they wanted, there are many subtle ways of doing so. After all, those who can afford it take their Medicare overseas and in any case, we depend on them for almost everything, including basic medicines. If they wanted to insert microchips, why didn’t they do it through the GSM lines or the internet? However, I have just one question for the relevant authorities: What are the plans for vaccination sustainably after we must have finished this baba-dash-me doses? How many doses of which brands have we ordered firmly (apart from the 300,000 doses from MTN) and when are the expected arrival dates? Meanwhile, the EU drug regulator, the European Medicines Agency has affirmed that AstraZeneca is safe and effective thereby agreeing with WHO and our own NAFDAC, which has also given a thumbs up for the covid-shield vaccine, licensed by AstraZeneca.

Re: A festival of oddities

I receive diverse feedbacks on my writings: some serious, some jocular, some brief, some long, some eulogizing, some expanding the scope of the original piece and some neither here nor there. It is therefore difficult to share these feedbacks, more so when some people are already advising me to shorten my writings. However, once in a while, I break my own rule by sharing some of the feedback. On my latest intervention, (a festival of oddities) which Barr MCK Ubah had described as literary therapy for reducing stress, I received a feedback from Sir Chudi Illo and here it is;

‘The Spirit at his best! Please, in the subsequent edition, kindly confirm that the Soweto School (that gave a cow-prize to the best student) was not established and run by Myetti Allah. Of course it is clear that the MassCom dept of COOU (that gave a cock and yam) is an establishment of ‘ebe-ozo ihuowelle’ (my ozo-title kindred), just as I am sure that the teachers in Niger state (who could neither read nor write) were tested in ‘dogon turenci’ instead of Arabic education in which they were trained. That was the case of wrong parameter or the falcon not hearing the falconer. You may have forgotten to mention that the First Dog belonging to the POTUS, suffered from Trumps delayed handover process and due to the delay, nobody remembered to give the first dog a proper orientation on how to live in the white house. He was not informed that dogs in the White House do not bite! So he has been taken back to Delaware (his roots) for proper orientation.

As for the UBE students in Makurdi (who were sent home for spiritual attack), they attempted to unearth the snake that swallowed the missing N28m and so, the god of snakes had to fight back. May I stop here so that the Benediction does not last longer than the Mass! Well, you can compare the original with the addendum and make up your mind!