As the inauguration approaches

I had been approached many years ago by a rather strange individual at a supermarket who spoke to me as a fan of mine in my many years in the broadcasting space. As always, I smiled a warm smile and thanked him for his kindness and prayers.

He wanted to know what I was buying so he could pick up the bill. I avoided the conversation assuring him I could pick up my own bill. I thanked him for his offer and graciousness. Not to be outdone, he started introducing me to everyone who entered the supermarket. Don’t you know her? Our newscaster….NTA nah and then a raucous laughter.

He tried to create a mini-fan club in the supermarket which made me feel uneasy. I wanted to run away, hide or simply disappear. He was on full throttle and now my items were at the till. I could not disappear on the many warm smiling faces around me.

When it was a bit quiet, I made my way to the pharmacy above the supermarket hoping to be rid of Chief Fan officer. It was not to be. He stealthily followed me and when I heard Hello Madam from behind me, I nearly jumped out of my skin. It was totally crazy. Because I have watched too many horror movies on crime channels, I wanted to slide past him downstairs and call Security. But he stopped me in my tracks.

A cunning smile brought a stranger matter to the fore. Ah madam, I really just want to have a conversation. Then he flashed his 100 watts smile. Don’t you want to be in government? It was a weird question you know. Chief Executive of a government agency? It was pretty corny so I stared at him in disbelief. I looked at his clothes; pretty dour stuff and unkempt hair. Then he began to drop names. The Chief of staff and I are meeting the President in Daura. I smiled a convincing smile.

I did not want him to abduct me in a lonely supermarket. He gave me his number and email. Send your CV within the hour. I am going by chattered plane to meet them. I sounded glad and grateful and when I fled the supermarket, I kept looking over my shoulder as if he was holed up in my car. This was at the junction of the President’s return in 2019.

But there have been others before this era. People who have demanded millions of naira for positions and have given discounts because you know, you are my Sister. People who have sent spurious office addresses in Federal ministries requesting that you meet them in these places surreptitiously on a Sunday, with names like Mr Dan or Mrs Reddish. I have been offered all manners of things and met gullible people who have followed through losing their deposits and not getting anywhere near the corridors.

I have also met people who have visited all manners of Prophets and Imams while carrying their CVs in their cars just in case they run into golden girls and boys of the incoming administration. Please be mindful that there are also those in the outgoing administration, promising that they have a leg in the incoming administration and they can fix anything.

Then there are also peddlers of untruth, praise singers and all manners of person’s intent on getting opportunities and getting noticed. We have arrived at the doorstep of intrigues and all manners of arrangements. It’s the Season. It’s the time for many tales of betrayal.

Transitions and pre- inauguration are very tricky. This is when political jobbers, appointment traders and new pretend friends of the incoming administration abound. Horse-trading, lies, backstabbing and desperation becomes every man and woman’s game. Integrity is thrown to the dogs and bizarre characters sell from dummies to real tales for positions. I have met people who scam artistes have taken to the cleaners, having been convinced that they are about to become CEOs and the position or competency is irrelevant. Just get the job first.

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These traders in our midst whose major sale pitch is influence peddling and have ruined many an agency by placing people in all manners of positions in the hope that their man or woman would do their will once they get in there. From political Godfatherism to emergency relations and associates of the incoming Tinubu/Shettima administration, this is what we have come to expect.

The need to be wide-eyed and circumspect both for aspiring citizens and the incoming government is important. This is a call to look closely at those demanding your CV at this time, those who promise you heaven and earth. And when it’s time, the incoming government must also look closely at those who say they can and pick only those who can

Of course the party would play a major role, those who worked hard in the campaign council would be looking in and all those who have proven their mettle in the service, in industry, in academia, in politics would all be angling forward. May wisdom be the forte of all those involved as many jostle ahead and beyond the inauguration. Let us all be on the side of Nigeria. Amen