5 funny Lagos traffic moments

Lagos traffic is its own unique experience, sometimes frustrating, sometimes bizarre, but always entertaining. If you have ever been stuck in Lagos traffic wondering how life led you there, you are not alone.

These hilarious Lagos traffic moments prove that the road is one giant unpredictable stage

The silent face-off – Nnamdi

In 2015, after attending a thanksgiving service at a friend’s church in Ikeja, I found myself in a massive traffic jam from Ozumba Mbadiwe Avenue down to the Lekki Toll Gate. On a Sunday! The cause? Two ladies had bumped into each other’s cars at the toll gate. Instead of stepping out to resolve the issue, they both remained seated, just staring at each other. One of them was even calmly pressing her phone while hundreds of cars queued behind them. The number of insults they must have received that day? Countless.

The roasted corn delay – Alao

Our bus came to a stop because a woman wanted to buy roasted corn. Not at a traffic light, not because of the police, but because of corn. The driver didn’t just stop, he waited patiently until the corn was roasted and ready. We were furious, but what could we do? We had already paid. When the woman finally got her corn, she cut it and gave part of it to the driver and conductor. And guess what? They collected it like it was an award.

Read also: ICYMI: 64 Lagos traffic offences and their penalties you probably don’t know

The pottage betrayal – Solape

One time, I boarded a BRT from Marina and bought some yam pottage to eat on the way home. Normally, I don’t ask people to join me, but that day, I jokingly asked the man beside me if he wanted some. I didn’t think he’d actually take me seriously. The next thing I knew, this man was eating my pottage, and the only piece of meat in it.

The bus chase – Habiyadanda

I was on my way home in a bus when our driver saw his friend, who had just been in an accident. Instead of offering words of comfort, the friend pointed at another driver and said, “That’s the guy that hit me!” That was all the motivation our driver needed. With a full bus, this man swerved off the expressway and started chasing the guy through inner streets like it was an action movie.

Fire? Stay where you are! – Aphrodite

While in transit around VI, the bus in front of us suddenly caught fire. To make matters worse, there was a fuel tanker beside us. Death was practically giggling at us. As we were about to run, our conductor locked the bus and shouted, “Tah! Make everybody siddon! No be una mates dey die every day?”(Sit down, everyone! Is it not your mates that die every day?)