The triangle of truisms: Father, mother and children

The secret to the success of every society has been a constant concern for philosophers, political scientists, secular and religious leaders and sociologist of all times. Their answer to this perennial question has been based on the authors’ background, experience or expertise. In proffering an answer, Etzkowitz and Leydesdoff formulated the principle of the Triple Helix. Triple Helix suggests that the interaction between the government, industry and the university, if effective, is a framework for success. On the other hand G.K Chesterton, in his book The Superstition of Divorce, provided the Triangle of truisms. Triangle of truisms stresses the importance of the natural family, the father, mother and child to the success of every society. According to Chesterton, this triangle of truism cannot be destroyed but would only destroy the civilization that disregards it.

From time immemorial, the family has been held to be the “nucleus of every civilization”. Aristotle wrote that the family is nature’s established association for the supply of mankind’s everyday wants. According to Michael Novak, the first, best and original department of health, education and welfare is the family.

Unfortunately this fact has been reduced to a cliché thereby neglecting its great depth and robust meaning.

The need to understand this robust meaning amidst current realties and changes, led the Foundation for African Cultural Heritage (FACH) to organize a three-day event: the African Regional Congress of Families. It took place at the Nigerian Institute for international Affairs (NIIA) from the 27 to the 29 of March. The congress attracted participants from USA, UK, Netherlands, Malawi, Uganda, Ethiopia, Kenya and several states in Nigeria. It had the likes of Ambassador Uche Ajulu-Okeke, Ambassador Usman Sarki, Archbishop Gabriel Abegunrin, Archbishop Martins, Dr. Philp Njemanze, Hon. Jeff Ojinaka, Mr. Hannibal Uwaifo and a host of others dignitaries in attendance. Other attendees comprised members of the Nigerian Bar Association (NBA), International Federation of Women Lawyers (FIDA), the ministry of education, the Office of the Public Defender Lagos State, clergy, royalty, university lecturers and students, press etc. The diversity and caliber of the attendees showed the importance people attach to the question and role of the family.

At the conference, it was discussed and resolved that the family is an institution of nature that predates any known religion or society. Historical research has proven that the family has always consisted of a man, woman and children. It was also highlighted that the family is under attack and it’s in dire need of protection. One major attack on the family is how it is constituted. Historically the family has always been constituted through the union of a man and woman (heterosexual). This is now changing. Court cases such as Obergefell v. Hodges (United States) and legislations (Mexico, Netherland, United Kingdom, etc) have now redefined marriage to include homosexual partners. This change has many fallouts. One of which is the attack on religious freedom and freedom of speech. Andrew March from the Christian Legal Centre UK, through several examples gave insights into how businessmen and women and professionals generally with views contrary to the same-sex view of marriage are been prosecuted and persecuted for their belief. Same applies also in the United States.

In another wave of cultural imperialism, there is enormous pressure on African governments to accept same sex marriage. The UK threatened to cut aid to Nigeria if the bill outlawing same-sex union became law. In 2014, when it seemed Nigeria was losing the battle against Boko Haram, the United States’ government through the Leahy Law frustrated attempts by the Nigerian government to buy weapons from them or their allies – most likely because of the passage of the anti-same sex marriage Act 2014 earlier in the year.

Other attacks on the family include the disruption of roles proper to members of the families. Worthy of mention, is the radical feministic movement which demonizes motherhood and regards the management and care of children and the home as retrogressive. Motherhood is now referred to as a waste of time, an economically worthless and socially disvalued enterprise, something that society should not welcome nor praise.

There is also the rise of divorce for all kinds of reasons both flimsy and real; the negative effect on the development of kids and their future relationships is undisputed.

Unfortunately, in their quest to achieve, professional and materialistic heights many have downplayed the importance of the family. They have delegated their duties to nannies whose competence and loyalty are often doubtful. All these explains why there is a rise in the number of domestic violence, sexual exploitation, child labour, human trafficking, poor performances of children in schools, and high drop-out rates in educational institutions.

There is also a wave of Comprehensive Sexuality Education (CSE) being taught in schools in different guises, which claims to teach children about sexuality. Apart from not being comprehensive, it doesn’t take into cognisance the proper information meant for appropriate ages. During the conference, a lawyer showed two books (Tears of a bride and Precious Child) which his primary 6 daughter was reading. She had difficulty understanding some phrases and she called her dad’s attention. The father discovered that the book contained words which were absolutely inappropriate for a girl her age. This shows there is an attempt to infiltrate the minds and hearts of the young ones and destroy their innocence.

Pitirim Sorokin, founder and first chair of the Sociology department at Harvard, after studying the history of hundreds of cultures found that all political revolutions that brought about societal collapse were preceded by a sexual revolution in which marriage and family were devalued. He stated: “Any considerable change in marriage behavior, any increase in sexual promiscuity and illicit relations, is pregnant with momentous consequences. A sex revolution drastically affects the lives of millions, deeply disturbs the community, and decisively influences the future of society”

The family is indeed the most important venture worth time and money.

The United Nations, through the Human Rights Council Resolution of 27^th of June 2016, re-echoing some of the things I stated above noted the following:

• the family is the natural and fundamental group unit of society, and is entitled to protection by society and the State
• Unfortunately, the contribution of the family in society and in the achievement of development goals continues to be underemphasized
• The positive impact that policies and measures to protect the family can have on protecting and promoting the human rights of its members should be recognised
• The family — while respect for the rights of its members is ensured — is a strong force for social cohesion and integration, intergenerational solidarity and social development, and that the family plays a crucial role in the preservation of cultural identity, traditions, morals, heritage and the values system of society;
• Thefamily unit is facing increasing vulnerabilities and pressures, and notes that single parent-headed households, child-headed households, families with members with disabilities and intergenerational households might be particularly vulnerable to poverty and social exclusion.

For a civilization to succeed, the family must succeed. Indeed stronger families lead to stronger societies. We need to take care of the family. As G.K Chesterton said “this triangle of truism cannot be destroyed but would only destroy the civilization that disregards it”.

 

J.B Nwachukwu

J.B Nwachukwu is a lawyer and a writer. [email protected]