Domestic violence: New face of criminality

It is happening almost every day across the country. Killings, killings and killings. The headlines that dot the Nigerian dailies nowadays are as horrific as they are nauseating. It is not about the Boko Haram campaign or of the kidnappers rampaging across the country. It is not also of the havoc that is being wreaked by the Fulani herdsmen or of the activities of ritualists who now make merchandise of fellow human beings. They are stories of men killing their wives, or wives killing their husbands. Sometimes, it is about father or mother killing his or her child. Today, children are also killing their parents. To the religious people, these are indeed, perilous times!

One of the latest in the chronicled saga of domestic killings happened in Ogun State a few days ago when a policeman went berserk and sent his wife and about six other persons to their early graves. He also took his own life.

Unlike in Asia and South America where people engage in what they call honour killings for their loved ones, which can more accurately be considered as crimes of passion, the many spontaneous killings in Nigeria are disturbing as they are executed with scary premeditation and careful planning.

In an internet article in 2008, ‘Nigerian men are killing their wives in America now’ on a popular Nigerian blog, the Linda Ikeji blog, several Nigerians, were listed, allegedly murdering their wives in America.

The men ranged between 40-50 years and the story was that they killed their wives out of bitterness. The complaint was that a man brought his wife to the United States, she trained as a nurse, made good money, and later either separated or had no respect for the man; then out of feeling of resentment, the man suddenly went to her abode and killed her crudely.

A commentator reacting angrily to the dangerous trend, said: “Only people who do not know God will do such things”. The commentator added: “It is fulfilling in our own eyes that God is giving wicked people a reprobate heart to do things that are unbelievable because they have no fear of God in them; they have abandoned God, that is why!”

Increasingly, the Nigerian Police are being confronted with the challenge of resolving the riddles arising from killing of one’s spouse or children.

A health expert, who spoke on condition of anonymity, said the escalating domestic fracas leading to avoidable deaths could be partly blamed on economic challenges in the country and state of mind of individuals.

“What we are seeing these days was totally alien in the years gone by. Today, people are more desperate; people are going through much stress-induced conditions that affect their behaviour.  These days, with the level of unemployment, a good number of men, even the educated ones are out of job. As a result they spend their time mingling with some worthless fellows, miscreants who foment trouble in the neighbourhood, and before long, they begin to manifest such traits. Some also, driven by sheer envy of their working wives, try to employ undue brute to assert their headship in the home. Because they are financially incapable of meeting the family needs, they begin to suspect their wives who struggle to do so. They begin to imagine things, such as suspecting their wives having affairs to get money. This continues to bite them to the point that they begin to contemplate murder,” he said.

A mental Health specialist also blamed the upsurge on money problem.

“Traditionally, the man is considered the bread winner. He is expected to make money available for the family food. Even though these days when it has become expedient for the woman to take on some kind of job either to fulfill her professional goal or to supplement the family food budget. Where this is not forthcoming is the beginning of danger signal, especially if the woman can ill afford to make a substantial contribution. The danger becomes even more acute if the woman believes the man makes enough money but fails to give sufficient amount to feed the family. The result: The woman nags. She complains in the presence of children. She let the children feel their father has failed in his duty and therefore, is useless. Quarrels ensue, and even fighting, swearing and cursing become the order of the day. Obviously, poor emotional mental environment is created. The couples may now just be co-habiting and not really living as a family. Love is lost and respect is lost for one another. At this point, anything is possible”, the expert said.

Some of the deviant behaviours resulting in domestic violence are said to be traceable to drugs and alcoholism.

“When a person, it could be a man or woman, is now doing drug, he or she becomes a danger to those around him or her.  Those who abuse alcohol, narcotics, morphine, heroin or stimulants such as cocaine, marijuana among others are capable of causing harm to other people under the influence of such substances. In Nigeria, many people easily get hooked to some of these drugs as a result of peer influence, particularly through constant association with bad people,” an expert told BDSUNDAY.

The nation’s magistrate courts are daily being inundated by divorce cases. It is on record that marriages are failing at an alarming rate. Experts attribute the trend to love lost in many homes.

A medical practitioner, who spoke with BDSUNDAY, explained that too many reasons were responsible for the upsurge in domestic killings going on in the country.

“Issues related to money management, lack of trust, and problem of sex are readily the challenges that lead to homicide. These days, we hear such things as ‘my partner is selfish’, he or she is spending the money alone without considering the family needs; or ‘my partner is promiscuous’, he or she runs after other women or men, as the case may be. We hear and read about scuffles arising from insufficient or lack of sex in the home. When any of these remains unresolved for a long time, it may degenerate into lost of love; the once vibrant and love-filled home becomes a battle ground where the man, in most cases, turns the wife into a punching bag or the woman begins to plot how to get rid of him to gain her freedom.

“In some cases, because of their physiological differences which naturally put the man easily in sexual mood, an inconsiderate man may be in the habit of pouncing on the wife to obtain pleasure without waiting for her to be in the mood. When this abuse continues, the woman may begin to put up some resistance and the man may now begin to accuse her of seeing other men outside. Or in extreme cases, when the man’s brutality persists, it may affect the woman’s mental health adversely and it could also manifest itself physically, socially, especially where the woman then seeks sexual satisfaction outside the matrimonial home. Don’t forget that a woman has sexual feelings and she needs to satisfy these feelings as much as the man does. But her physiology must be understood. When the husband does not consider this, and continues in his brute manner, then the home becomes a mini hell. It could lead to homicide.”

A matron with a private hospital in Lagos, Helen Onos, said inability of both partners to understand the changing times often causes trouble in the home, and has led to homicide cases.

“When I grew up in the village many years ago, my father was seen as a mini god; his words must be obeyed and no one dared question his authority. His words were always our mother’s command. In fact, it was not synonymous with my family, it was the trend then. It was basically because women looked up to their husbands at that time for everything;  I mean everything. Women were only concerned about women matters. But with education, technology and orientation women have come to join the rat race. Today, in many homes women are even the bread winners. So, with this role swapping and ‘liberation’ of women so to speak, some women who do not understand their limit begin to see themselves as equal with their husbands, probably because of their better education, lucrative job, social status and exposure. And as Africans, men hardly swallow such pill. So, when it is obvious that the woman is no longer submissive, in most cases, the man goes berserk. It could also happen the other way round, that is when despite the woman’s contribution in the home, the man remains unappreciative but suspicious, some women of little minds, who find themselves in this circle take drastic measures that either lead to divorce or brutality.”

Herbert Oke, a sociologist, said part of the causes of family problems nowadays had to do with the copy-cat nature of many Nigerians. According to him, the habit of many people to copy everything they see from foreign lands has endangered their homes.

“The Nigerian culture as it touches marriage institution is very unique. But it appears something terrible is happening to it. The rate at which marriages are failing and homicides are taking place suggest we are copying so much from foreign cultures. It is very injurious. In those days, we used to read about how a man killed his wife or the other way round, and we shuddered. Today, we are seeing worst things happening here”, Oke said.

Marriages that ended in disaster

1. A few days ago, Umaru of Jerin, 60, of Duwatsu Village, Wanke district of Gusau Local Government Area of Zamfara State, slapped his wife, Inno, to death following a matrimonial disagreement.

It was suggested that the man may have been   provoked by the confrontational attitude of the wife, as was allegedly openly venting her anger on him.

2. Last Monday, a man, Benjamin Toma was paraded by Chris Olape, Plateau State Police commissioner, for allegedly killing his 25 years old wife, Victoria. Toma was said to have stabbed her and later hanged her to given impression that she committed suicide.

3. Last month, an Ikeja High Court in Lagos sentenced to death by hanging Akolade Arowolo who stabbed his banker wife 76 times. In her judgment, which lasted more than three hours, Lateefat Okunnu, the judge, held that evidence before the court proved that Arowolo actually murdered his wife in their matrimonial home.

Okunnu had relied on a forensic report produced by a pathologist, John Oladapo Obafunwa, a professor, showing that the deceased received 76 stab wounds.

4. A middle-aged man in Makurdi, Benue State, reportedly beat his wife, Victoria, to death after accusing her of committing adultery. The man, identified as Moses Abelegah, who lives behind Saint Augustine Catholic Church, Demekpe in Makurdi, has since been arrested by the police.

5. A woman was arrested in December 2013 over the murder of her husband, Victor Nsongbunyo, a deputy manager attached to Nigeria Petroleum Development Company (NPDC), Benin City. The woman was said to have connived with her pastor boy friend, to perpetrate the crime.

The deceased was due to retire from service this year before he met his death. It was learnt that the deceased and his wife had been having issues with the paternity of their children after the deceased suspected the wife was having an extra-marital affair with the pastor. The deceased was said to have visited home to complain to both his family and that of his wife, after suspecting that the pregnancy the wife was carrying was not from him.

6. A police corporal identified as Sunkanmi Ogunbiyi and attached to the Ogun State Police Command reportedly run amok in Eleweran area in Odeda Local Government, releasing volley of bullets which killed his wife, Oluwatosin Faremi; also a police corporal, a commercial motorcyclist, five members of a family and subsequently killed himself.

BDSunday gathered that Ogunbiyi, who was transferred from Ajuwon Police State to Ogun State Police Command, Eleweran, Abeokuta was so much in love with his slain wife, Oluwatosin Faremi, to the extent that whenever he was to be transferred anywhere, he would also arrange the transfer of his wife; some people also insinuated that they both ran joint bank account. But their marital relationship turned deadly penultimate Thursday when Ogunbiyi, who was reported to have arrived at the No. 67, Ifelodun Street, Akingbala area, Eleweran in Abeokuta, the residence of the slain family of five who had allegedly been accommodating his wife and his two children at about 7:02am and opened fire, killing his wife and the commercial motorcyclist identified as Kunle before entering the house where he wreaked further havoc.

7.  A 30-year-old Nwode Chukwudi Awam, was last week paraded by the police for allegedly for beheading his father, Michael Awam, 56, and eating the victim’s neck at Egwudinagu Obegu village in Ebonyi Local Government Area of the state.

8. Some time ago, a 46-year-old unemployed man, at Agbado in Ogun State was arrested for allegedly killing his wife by throwing her into a pit latrine over a domestic misunderstanding.

Economic implication

Commentators say that a family where the man kills his wife will have plunged the children into a serious problem.

“If a man kills his wife, the implication is that he has endangered the children who will now be orphans so to speak. This is because the man may not be a free person again to cater for the children. So, those children will rely on their peers and likely learn the negative parts of life. Their education will suffer as there will be no one to take care of that. They may be pushed to join bad gangs and become terrors in society. And because their education is stopped and also the fact that they are not able to learn any trade, a culture of poverty is unleashed on the family,” a commentator said.

Social implication

It is believed that children from such a family miss the affection of their mother or their father, whichever way. Children are better raised by both parents, and when it is no longer possible under a terrible situation as domestic killing, it becomes a serious problem. According to experts, children from such homes suffer all manner of segregation in society. They carry some stigma that makes it difficult for them to relate well in society, as people will always see them as replicating the wickedness of their parent or parents as the case may be. In a situation where a father is killed by a son, such an episode is bound to place a heavy load on the woman, who might be tempted to do things she ordinarily would not want to do just to provide for the children left behind by the husband.

Legal practitioner reacts

Reacting to the gale of domestic killings in the country, Samuel Oyigbo, a medical practitioner said the punishment depends on the nature of offence.

“If it is intentional, that is, if it is murder, it is expected to attract death sentence. But if it is unintentional, that is manslaughter; it usually attracts life imprisonment in law. Section 4 of the Police Act mandates the police to arrest and carry out investigations. So, it is often advisable that once there is an established case, one should take it to the police irrespective of what one may think,” Oyigbo said.

The lawyer further said that the suspected killer “will be arraigned in a magistrate court. But usually, the magistrate court often has no jurisdiction for such cases. However, for the people whose kith and kin or relative was killed, they may get justice from the Department for Public Prosecution (DPP). But if they think they cannot get justice, they may engage a private lawyer who has to apply for a fiat before doing so.”

According to him, “People should cease writing reports to authorities themselves. Such reports should be done by a lawyer. Usually, the police that present the matter may do so poorly, sometimes; a few of them do a wishy-washy job. If an investigation is properly done, the Ministry of Justice can give justice. But most times, people in the ministry may not be too serious about it.

“In the Biblical, for example in Numbers 35:30, the Bible recommends death penalty for murderers. This is why I do not subscribe to the views that they should be pardoned.”

A cleric’s view

In his reaction, Raphael Nwaenigwe, a cleric, said Nigeria needed a spiritual cleansing.

“The rate of killings in this country shows that there is need for spiritual cleansing. These are end times and as the Bible prophesied, during this period, people’s love will wax cold. Though many people may be inclined to attribute it to social and economic situations of the country, we must not lose sight of the fact that people are becoming more susceptible to violence, more irascible   and ambitious. I see this as a fulfillment of prophesy and a call for us all to return to God. The level of bloodshed in the country, despite our religiousity, shows there is need for repentance”, Nwaenigwe said.

Zebulon Agomuo, ODINAKA ANUDU